The
Apostle Peter is an interesting character as revealed to us in the Gospels,
Acts, and the epistles he wrote. Sometimes I feel like I can identify with him
in the emotional chaos of his life. A superficial look at his life reveals an
emotional roller coaster with many highs often followed rapidly by deep lows.
Peter has always struck me as a robust man. He was a man of the sea having made
his livelihood in the family trade as a fisherman along the Sea of Galilee. His
encounter with Jesus at the instance of his brother, Andrew, rocked his world.
The fishing nets were set aside and he joined the mission of Jesus to become a “fisher
of men.” He may have left his nets behind, but he brought his personality with
him! Terms that could easily describe his life at times might be: perceptive,
positive, risk-taker, leader, devoted, articulate, committed, and faithful. At
other times, better words to depict him might be: fearful, betrayer, dense,
deceived, unthinking, discouraged, defeated, emotional, impetuous, and
unfaithful. His highs were nose-bleed high; his lows were Death Valley-deep. He
frequently swung between the extremes like a pendulum.
Perhaps that is why I identify with him.
My life at times feels like an emotional seesaw. Many also may feel that kind
of connection to Peter’s personality. Our spiritual lives swing between soaring
elation to bouts of sinking dejection. How does the Lord look upon such
individuals? Does Jesus write us off or pour His love and grace into our
wounded lives? Is there usefulness beyond the depth of defeat and despair?
The events after Easter shed some light on
that question. After the crucifixion Peter is in one of the low spots in his
life. While Jesus was being tried Peter had denied him three times just as the
Lord had predicted. As soon as the rooster crowed, the guilt of what he had
done immediately crushed him and he went out and wept (Luke 22:62). Then Jesus
was cruelly crucified and buried in a borrowed tomb. On Easter morning the
resurrected Jesus gave a message to the startled women who came to the tomb to
deal with the dead body of Jesus. He said to them, “Go, tell his disciples and Peter that he is going before you to
Galilee” (Mark 16:7). Jesus reached out to Peter in the darkest time of his
life to assure him that Jesus had not written him off. Peter’s failure did not
signal his life was irreparable and his relationship to Jesus was finished. In
those few words Jesus signaled to Peter that there is life beyond the depths of
defeat.
Perhaps Peter wondered after such a
failure how fully his life could be restored to the relationship he once
enjoyed. Maybe that is why in that post-resurrection period Peter decided his
“career” with Jesus was over and he might as well return to his former
occupation. Scripture reports, Simon Peter said to [the other disciples], ‘I am
going fishing.’ They said to him, ‘We will go with you.’ They went out and got
into the boat, but that night they caught nothing” (John 21:3). Jesus again reconnects
to Peter in a post-resurrection appearance at a beach breakfast (21:15-19). He reinstates
Peter to his calling of being a fisher of men and a shepherd of sheep. Jesus
then does much more. He reveals that he wants a relationship with Peter –
Peter’s love. Jesus never lost his love for Peter and he wants Peter to reaffirm
his love for him. Paul’s words in a different context reveal the staying power
of Jesus’ love by asking, “Who shall separate us from the love of Christ?” He
then concludes, “We are more than conquerors through him who loved us… [nothing]
else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God in
Christ Jesus our Lord” (Romans 8:35, 37, 39). Even our foolish decisions and
failures do not sever us from Christ’s love!
Have you ever wondered what the Apostle
Peter felt like after Easter? He was lower than dirt in the beginning, and
later at that beach breakfast, higher than the skies. I have known the agony of
spiritual defeat. I have also experienced the restorative love of a forgiving
Savior. Paul reminds us about this Jesus, “If we are unfaithful, he remains
faithful, for he cannot deny who he is” (2 Timothy 2:13).
Peter discovered this. I have too. Have
you? He can restore one feeling useless to renewed usefulness! What grace!
