A Tale of Two Tables

The latest glossy magazines arriving at our home are filled with ideas about decorating and cooking for the upcoming Thanksgiving dinner. Elegant table settings are featured with a noticeable absence of people at the table so as not to disturb the ambiance. Suggestions are offered to host and hostesses about how to have just the right look for the table setting. The table decor is even broken down into categories and themes so that just the right atmosphere is created. Every time I see these pictures I wonder if they ever envision any children sitting at the table. Perhaps they have made the assumption that children will be relegated to a folding table safely separated from the adult’s table. Perhaps it is wise to station the children’s table at a distance of at least four feet or whatever is necessary to avoid a glob of gravy covered mashed potatoes launched from their table. However, if they are assuming that children will be at these elaborate tables, what kind of children are they expecting? Are they hoping some agency will provide child “doubles” to sit at their holiday tables looking good and manifesting manners beyond their years? Somehow the ornate table arrangements gracing the covers of these magazines never seem to fit the scene at our family’s Thanksgiving table. Mind you we are a step above what may have occurred at a Viking’s banquet table. But I think we hold the record for major spills at a table before anyone is seated!

     As a child I remember two aunts and their two very different holiday tables. Keep in mind both of these dear ladies were outstanding Irish cooks. They both believed in providing abundant amounts of mouthwatering delectable options. They could even make green vegetables and assorted squashes appealing to the most discriminating child’s palette. However, one aunt’s dinners always stood out to me. Her table would never make the cover of one of the glossy magazines. She provided all that was necessary but never focused upon the frills. Her decorating approach was rather utilitarian – what was on a plate was to be eaten not looked at. She thought candles only took up space on the table where another bowl of goodies could reside. Therefore candles never appeared at the table unless it was on the top of a cake to commemorate a recent or coming birthday. The plates, flatware, and glasses did not all match, but were all clean and functional. With three rambunctious boys in her house, it was a wonder that any glasses and plates had survived! This is what I remember most about the day at her table. When we arrived, all she was doing was dropped, hands were wiped on her stained white apron, her arms wrapped around me in a bear hug, and her arthritic hands ruffled my hair. Her laughter made me laugh for no reason at all. Honestly, after such a reception, what was on the table was even more delicious because she made it.

     My other aunt’s holiday table was very different. Walking into her house you were greeted with smells that immediately engaged the salivary glands. My uncle would greet us and take our coats and seat us in the living room that looked into the dining room. I could spy the table. Candles were lit. The Irish bone china was at each place setting along with the crystal stemware. Silverware surrounded the place settings and I sat in the living room trying to recall which fork and spoon I was to use first and when. A Thanksgiving bouquet was in the middle of the table. It was gorgeous – in fact it now reminds me of some of those glossy magazine covers. I could hear my aunt in the kitchen, and I think I could hear her say, “Hello.” But I knew better that to walk into her kitchen and get in the way. She had a Thanksgiving meal on her mind and bustled about as a woman on a mission. Honestly, her meals were absolutely delicious too. Somehow the impression of the visit was one of appreciation and less of affection.

     The Bible records Jesus impression of a dinner where he was an honored guest. In Luke 10:38-42 we read of the two sisters that prepared the meal, Mary and Martha. Martha was a woman on a mission – she had a meal to prepare and that was no small task in days lacking basic cooking conveniences and where everything was made from scratch. Mary was also on a mission – she had a person to focus on who was normally surrounded by a crush of people keeping him distant from her. But now she had the privilege of being close to him, sitting at his feet, and listening to teaching that was so different from that which she would hear from other rabbis. Mary’s mission annoyed Martha. The tension became so intense that Martha asked Jesus to intervene and demand that Mary “get with the mission” of serving a meal and lay aside doing nothing but hanging around with Jesus. Instead of intervening, Jesus commended Mary for her mission of being with him and listening to his teachings – teaching which had the capacity of changing her life.

     Jesus made it clear, Martha’s meal distracted her from what was important. Jesus concluded that her mission resulted in her “being anxious and troubled about many things.” Mary on the other hand honored Jesus by paying undivided attention to him and the things he had to share about life. Jesus said, “Mary has chosen the good portion.” Sometimes our doing can keep us from what is most important, focusing on and enjoying people.

     I deeply loved my two aunts. They taught me a lesson about life as they lovingly served their Thanksgiving extravaganza. The meal is not nearly as important as the people who come to the meal. You can prepare a dinner that is fit to make the cover of a glossy magazine and it will be appreciated by your guests. A better alternative is to prepare a dinner that will be more than a meal. It will be a memory. That happens when our main focus is upon the people who have joined us for our special celebrations.     

Time Keeps on Slippin' Into the Future

            The Steve Miller Band sings in their song Fly Like an Eagle, “Time keeps on slippin', slippin', slippin' Into the future.” We really don’t need a song to remind us of that reality. Every year as one’s birthday rolls around one is reminded that another year has finished or begun. It all depends upon one’s perspective. The pessimist looks at a birthday as a countdown to the end of life. The optimist sees this anniversary as the launch into a year of new possibilities. Needless to say, it does mark that time is marching on and another notch has been made in the calendar of life.

            I just passed another age milestone a few days ago and have been reminded with cards and Facebook greetings that I have not gotten younger – as if my body needed to be reminded! Then I came across this thought in a devotional booklet that Bob Boardman, who at age 59, wrote, “If the 70 years of a normal life span were squeezed into a single 24-hour day, it would now be 8:30 in the evening in my life. . . . Time is slipping by so rapidly.” Well, I am older than 59, so I assume for me it’s beyond 8:30 and close to my bedtime!

            The Bible gives a number of reminders about the brevity of life too. The Psalmist David writes, “Each man’s life is but a breath” (Psalm 39:5). The New Testament writer James agrees by saying, “What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes” (James 4:14). These truths certainly smack against the thought we often have about our invincibility – a thought very keen when we are younger but less so as we age. Perhaps that is why Peter pictures humans this way, "All people are like grass, and all their glory is like the flowers of the field; the grass withers and the flowers fall” (1 Peter 1:24). He either is referring to or drawing the same conclusion as the Psalmist (103:15-16), “As for man, his days are like grass; As a flower of the field, so he flourishes. When the wind has passed over it, it is no more, And its place acknowledges it no longer.”

            How should one think in view of these realities? Thomas Manton concludes, "A man's greatest care should be for that place where he dwelleth longest; eternity should be his scope." This is great advice for people who are designed by God to be eternal.

            In what way should our perspective be altered? Our living would be adjusted. Paul writes, “Therefore be careful how you walk [live], not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil.” (Ephesians 5:15-16). Too often the hours and days of our life are squandered in trivial pursuits rather than in wise endeavors. Does it really matter that we rush to someone’s Facebook page or their latest Tweet to see where they are, what they are doing, or what they had for breakfast? Yet often hours are consumed in technology that has little significant impact in one’s life.

            Perhaps where we invest our lives needs to be altered. Jesus advises people, “Do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy, and where thieves break in and steal. But store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys, and where thieves do not break in or steal; for where your treasure is, there your heart will be also” (Matthew 6:19-21). On another occasion Jesus shared a parable with a man who was squabbling with his brother over an inheritance. The story talks about a man who could only think about amassing stuff on earth. Jesus says that man was a fool and concludes, “So is the one who lays up treasure for himself and is not rich toward God” (Luke 21). Investments reflect our hearts and reveal how focused we are on eternity. Many relationships have been damaged by persons pursuing the American dream only to discover that in the process that have created a nightmare for themselves. Our mates and our children are more likely to remember the time we invested in them rather than the trinkets for which we worked so hard to buy them.

            Over the years I have planned hundreds of funerals with families who had experienced the death of a loved one. I sat with them and heard the stories they told about their family member. Rarely can I recall those grieving loved ones talking about material possessions. They spoke about things that had made an eternal impact in their lives like love, support, care, and many other things that money cannot buy.

            Rick Warren wisely concluded in his book The Purpose Driven Life, “You weren't put on earth to be remembered. You were put here to prepare for eternity.” Remember, “Time keeps on slippin’, slippin’, into the future!”

Lesson from a Coal Stove

Many years ago the voice of Aunt Peggy interrupted a sound sleep. I responded by drawing the covers up over my head thinking that, if I ignored the voice, somehow it would go away. It didn’t. The voice returned an octave higher and a decibel louder allowing the words to finally penetrate my foggy morning mind. She said in her thick Irish brogue, “If you want a warm kitchen in which to dress, pancakes for breakfast, and hot water to wash in, you need to take care of the stove.”

            The mention of pancakes motivated me to move from under the covers, step onto the cold floor, and stretch out the overnight stiffness – a stretch that would make any cat proud. Taking care of the stove was a reference to the massive cast-iron coal cook stove in the country kitchen. It was a multitask appliance – heater to dissipate the costal Maine chill, water heater to take the edge off the cold bathroom water, and most importantly, the cooking stove that made the best hotcakes on Mt Dessert Island.

            Slipping on my unlaced sneakers, I plodded down the hallway in a sleepy trance with the coal bucket in hand. At the massive coal bin I shoveled coal into the bucket until it was full and just at the point that I could barely lift it. Then with both hands on the handle, I lugged the bucket back to the kitchen to feed the stove.

            I got the lid lifter and removed the lids to the coal stove, and filled a shovel of coal from the bucket. Aunt Peggy’s voice froze my arm in midair as she asked, “Have you riddled the stove? Always riddle the stove before you put in more coal.” The term “riddled” is a word used for removing ash from the combustion chamber of a coal stove. I knew this needed to be done but I was careless. So I put the coal down, got the crank to “riddle” the stove, and cranked so the ashes would fall into the ash pan. I stopped when I saw the red coals begin to appear in the pan and knew the ash was gone. When all that was left in the stove were red hot coals, I began feeding the stove the coal. The key to a productive cook stove was to have the useless ash removed so a healthy fire could develop. The smell of the burning coal was evident even before I could get the lids on the top of the stove replaced. With satisfaction I knew that within a half hour the next smell that would greet me would be the aroma of hot cakes generously filled with the Maine blueberries we picked the day before.

            In a similar way, sometimes one needs to be “riddled” to get rid of that which is useless in their life so they can be as productive as they should be. Often in the course of living one allows things to exist in their life that tends to smother productivity. Instead of living a life that is “hot” one simply “smolders,” living an unproductive life. Sometimes one is even unaware of their condition assuming all is well when actually all could be much better.

            In the book of Revelation, Jesus writes letters to seven churches. One of these churches, Laodicea, was unaware that the life they were living was not as productive as it should be (Revelation 3:14-22). They thought that they were “hot” stuff, saying, “I am rich; I have acquired wealth and do not need a thing” (17). Jesus on the other hand saw their real condition. Their fire was going out because they had a lot of inhibiting “ash” in their life that needed to be removed. Jesus says, “But you do not realize you are wretched, pitiful, poor, blind and naked.” He sees their life as one that needs some shaking up.

            Rather that write them off as a lost cause, Jesus “riddles” them with His love, rebuke, and discipline. He challenges them to “be earnest and repent” (19). Once they are “riddled” he is willing to supply what will make their life “hot” and productive again. He invites them “to buy from me gold refined in the fire; and white clothes to wear, so you can cover your shameful nakedness; and salve to put on your eyes to see” (18). Christ wants productivity restored.

            How does Christ in love “riddle” us? Sometimes that which loosens the “ash” from our life is disappointment, discouragement, defeat, disease, or some type of discipline. One should be removing the “ash” of sin regularly from their lives as they “throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles us” (Hebrews 12:1). However, sometimes one forgets that one needs to get rid of the “ash.” God loves people so much He does not want one to stay in that unproductive state. He “disciplines us for our good that we may share in his holiness” (12:7-11). He loves to see His children live productive lives.

            The lesson from the coal stove is a simple one. Remove the ash and become productive again. The lesson from Christ is a simple one too. Repent of the sin that diminishes your productivity as a Christian and become the child of God he has designed you to be.   

Tourist or Resident?

Usually about this time each year I begin to fanaticize about being in Maine along the rocky coast shrouded in a cool foggy mist. I can almost hear the drone of the fog horn in the background and the squawk of sea gulls.  The hazy, hot, humid weather has won the battle and my t-shirt, damp with perspiration, is being waved in the air to signal surrender – or at least dry a little bit. A person can only endure so much of the three “H’s” until their steam-boiled brain starts to fanaticize about a way of escape. Some people have mirages of catching the breezes on the Susquehanna River while dangling a fishing line behind the boat with an occasional dip in the river to cool off. Others dream about laying on the beach at some shore point slathered in number 30 sun screen interrupted only by an occasional immersion in the cooling ocean. Then there are those who picture the perfect escape as a retreat to a mountain cabin nestled in a grove of trees, located near a babbling stream which will later lull them to sleep after consuming way too many s’mores around the camp fire. We all can vividly imagine our place of escape and are convinced that our solution is the best solution to deal with the 3 H’s.

     My summer coping solution has been cultivated and embedded into my DNA after almost 60 years of making the summer trek to Downeast Maine. My family concludes I am addicted to the place because I feel like I haven’t been on a vacation until I have been there sometime during the year. They have even gone as far as calling me a “Maineac!” Just because one has miniature lighthouses and paintings of the rocky coast around the house is no reason to call one names! I admit it, “I love Maine!” For many years I even had a bumper sticker that said so on our station wagon that I called our “Maine” car.

     Lest you feel compelled to have an intervention to break me of my Maine addiction, let me assure you there are others like me and even worse. Paul, an older friend of mine, loved Maine as intensely as I did. Actually, he probably loved it much more than I did. I love Maine so much I am willing to spend my vacation there almost every summer. He loved the place so much he was willing to move there. He sold his home and farm in Bucks County, left a secure position with a company, uprooted his wife and three daughters, and settled into a community along the coast. He loved Maine enough to become a permanent resident. I loved Maine enough to visit yearly. If you measured love by the commitment and investment one makes, you would have to conclude that he loved Maine more than I did. Paul was a resident – he was all there. I was a mere tourist – I was there when convenient and I needed my “Maine-fix.”

     Could there be a parallel between Paul’s and my love for Maine and the way one loves Christ and His Bride, the church? There are many people who declare they love Christ and His church. What do they mean by that affirmation? Their commitment and investment may be rather revealing about the nature of their love. In John 6:24-25 there were many people who classified themselves as followers of Jesus after the miracle of the feeding of the 5,000. However, when Jesus started making amazing claims and teaching difficult truths, they withdrew and followed Jesus no more (6:60, 66). There was one group of followers that remained, the disciples (6:67-69). They remained because they were fully committed and invested in Jesus and believed His claims.

     Kyle Idleman writes in his book, Not a Fan: Becoming a Completely Committed Follower of Christ, “My concern is that many of our churches in America have gone from being sanctuaries to becoming stadiums. And every week all the fans come to the stadium where they cheer for Jesus but have no interest in truly following him.” Then he adds this sobering thought, “The biggest threat to the church today is fans who call themselves Christians but aren’t actually interested in following Christ. They want to be close enough to Jesus to get all the benefits, but not so close that it requires anything from them.” The people who followed Jesus in John 6 wanted the benefits of the free meal, but not the burden of taking up their cross and following Jesus (Matthew 16:24-25). Jesus wants followers, not fans. Jesus wants people who are willing to be residents in His Kingdom, committed fully to His principles and plans for their lives no matter the cost. Jesus is not looking for mere tourists coming only for the benefits they derive while fully intending to live elsewhere.

     Around the world there are multiple examples of Christians who are fully committed and invested in Christ’s person, principles, and plans. They are followers and not fans. They are residents in Christ’s kingdom, not tourists. Their commitment is costly and for them horrendous suffering is the norm. Their investment means more than enduring harsh words, cultural marginalization, or economic loss. They have been physically abused and even murdered. Yet their Christian communities are thriving and having a huge impact in their country and world. Again we see a repeat of what one church historian wrote of the persecution of the early church, “The blood of the martyrs has become the seed of church.”

     Christ is calling us to love Him and to love His world (Luke 10:27). True followers will do that as they worship Christ and invest in people and their needs. They will have an impact. Those who are mere fans of Christ will be looking for an exciting pep rally to juice up their emotions and give them a spiritual charge, continue loving themselves and focusing upon their own needs. They will have an impact too – they will be perplexing.

Living for More than "Like"

     We live in a culture of “like.” The statement alludes to how people, who use social media, frequently check their postings on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, etc. to see if they were “liked” by readers or followers. Our culture seems obsessed by the approval of others. Recently a great deal of commotion was created because an entertainment figure’s new Twitter account became the fastest growing account to reach 1 million followers. It surpassed the previous record held by the President of the USA. It was assumed that such apparent approval must somehow translate into a person’s significance. With this obsession for approval from others, how many life decisions are being altered so that we will be liked, followed, or approved?

     On July 4, 1776, how many signers of the Declaration of Independence were worried about being “liked?” Those fifty-six men were not obsessed by being approved for their decision. They clearly knew that the British Empire would not approve. Additionally, historians indicate a majority of Americans opposed the war in 1775 and believe only about a third of all Americans supported a war at that time (USHistory.org). Their decision focused not upon the approval of people but the conviction that their cause was just. In the Declaration of Independence they lay out the reasons for their decision and conclude the document with this commitment, “For the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of divine Providence, we mutually pledge to each other our Lives, our Fortunes and our sacred Honor.” They realized there would be a cost to do what they believed. They did not focus upon people’s approval of their decision but the approval of God.

     History records that the fifty-six signers all paid a price for their commitment. History’s record of the price they paid may vary but the truth remains, their action was not based upon people’s approval. They were convinced that what they believed was right. Courage in the face of disapproval charted the course for our nation’s independence.

     How is our approval obsession impacting our current culture? Commercial advertising is geared to have us think that what we do, wear, drive, eat, watch, listen to, and a hundred other choices need the approval of others. Career decisions are being made with a focus upon the prestige and approval a job or position will create. Coming into this election season, politicians are hiring political pollsters to guide them in making decisions that will be approved by the voters. It seems that we are infected and driven by the desire for approval throughout our culture. There are notable exceptions of people willing to march to the beat of a different drummer, but it seems that the majority in our culture are captivated by the approval of others.

     The obsession has also impacted the operations of many churches and numerous Christians. Chris Tiegreen notes, “We [Christians] are prone to act more spiritual than we really are around other Christians, and act more worldly than we really are to make an impression on non-religious folks. We are, more often than we think, shaped by the opinion – real or assumed – of those around us.” We are “chameleon Christians” altering and adapting as necessary to find the approval of people rather than seeking the only approval that really matters, God’s. 

     Christ is the supreme example of living for the approval of God and not the fickle applause and approval of people. Jesus challenged contemporary culture, bucked the religious establishment, and supported and maintained the teachings of Scripture when others did not. He even turned over the tables on people who were desecrating the standards of God. He did this not to be controversial or unique, but because of what motivated his heart, “I always do those things that please Him [Heavenly Father]” (John 8:29). His single focus was the approval of God which would then qualify Him to then effectively minister to people.

     Oswald Chambers wrote, “When you fear God, you fear nothing else… If you do not fear God, you fear everything else.” It seems often the Christian community in the USA fears everything else. The result is they are fickle in their faith and flighty in the way they live life. The surrounding culture sees this and is a bit amazed. If God is who we say He is, they wonder, “Why do Christians not seek His approval rather than culture’s?” Instead, many churches look to polls for doctrinal positions, popular cultural activities to determine their practices, and contemporary philosophies for the content of their preaching. The assumption is this generates people’s approval. Realistically it only engenders God’s disapproval. Leave the western culture and we see the church rapidly growing in many parts of the world where the church is more interested in God’s approval than people’s. Are they ridiculed for their beliefs? Yes! Are they persecuted even to the point of death? Yes! Are they having a significant impact in the world where God has placed them? Yes!

     Some time ago I overheard a conversation with a non-religious young adult. He was asked why he was not drawn to a rather avant-garde expression of Christianity. He responded, “Because that church is just like us, and we are sick of ourselves.” He did not want something he could approve of, but something that was authentic, life-altering, and otherworldly. He wanted to hear about a Savior, Jesus Christ, of whom the world did not approve, but God did. He wanted a changed life his world could not offer, like it or not!